About the author:
Ross Bone was born and raised on the mean streets of Teynham, Kent. He attended Teynham Primary School before moving on to a harrowing 2 year spell at St John’s (later to become Sittingbourne Community College.) He was fortunate enough to escape to continue his education at Borden Grammar School for Boys. Here he became a keen sportsman and a wonderfully intelligent, handsome young man.
Bone continued his education at the University of Sussex. Bone studied banter under the strict tutelage of Andrew David Gordon Haslam, Jonathan William Hooker and Oliver James Ashton Hire. He also got a degree in English Language.
Today, Bone is still a keen sportsman, turning out regularly for the mighty Lewes Hockey Club and (less regularly) for Poynings Cricket Club. He is still learning every day but has had his intellect dulled, as many do, by the monotony of his soul destroying 9-5 at Castle Greyskull. (Or Legal & General.)
He is a supporter of Liverpool Football Club and of course follows the Kent Spitfires.
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You failed to mention the clearly evident Dutch influence during your pubescent years, which ultimately made you the man you are today. If it wasn’t for a certain “guy” you’d be lying in a gutter somewhere on Lawn road, with Mercedes people-carrier treadmarks on your forehead. Respect might be just a 7 letter word, but throwing some of it in this general direction wouldn’t go amiss.
Sorry Guy. I obviously am eternally grateful for the Dutch influence you exerted over my development as a person. My apologies for your omission. Should I win any awards for my blog I will be sure to thank you in my acceptance speech.
Godverdomme.